When I was young, so they tell me, I was a knock-out. I never had to worry about Saturday night dates; I had multiple offers. Frankly, it was a lot of fun being a good-looking girl.
I am now 76 and although not unattractive for my age, have subsided into being one of those ladies who is offered a seat on the subway. The first time was a terrible shock. I thought, “Gee, I looked good to myself in the mirror before I left the house. Maybe not as good as I thought.”
One of my mother’s friends, many years ago, gave me this preview: “You will become invisible to most of the world. They’ll pass you by on the street as if you didn’t exist” (except for potential old-lady muggers, I’ll assume). No more catcalls from construction workers on lunch breaks. You are no longer the target audience for sexual harassment notices on bulletin boards.
When I first moved into my apartment behind the Columbia University campus, I worried that I would feel out of place, being neither a student nor a member of the faculty. No fears; I walk through the campus undisturbed, like a ghost.
These are the years when one is grateful for one’s excellent education, as well as one’s many years of service in various workplaces. You have developed, as Sylvia Nassar wrote of the late John Nash, a “beautiful mind.”
The other evening, I prepared a special dinner for my partner Walter, complete with four courses, dimmed lighting, lit candles. He looked at me, and at the table, and said — being a man of few words — “beautiful.”
I don’t know if he meant the upcoming dinner or me, but you know what? I’ll take it.
Sally Haver retired in 2013 after a long career with the The Ayers Group, div. of Kelly Services as a Senior Business Development Executive. As a senior career management consultant, she has a broad-based business background encompassing human resources consulting, recruitment, advertising/marketing, music production, academia and show business. Since retiring, she has found that there are many people who are working during their post-retirement years, and not necessarily because they have to work. Some retirees are interested in pursuing a lifetime dream, and others find tremendous fulfillment simply by undertaking a new challenge.
Sally Haver
Sally Haver is a senior sales/marketing professional and career management consultant with a broad-based business background encompassing human resources consulting services, recruitment, university placement, advertising/marketing, and show business. At The Ayers Group, in her 19th year of service, Ms. Haver adeptly leverages her wide range of corporate senior contacts, combined with excellent writing and platform presentation skills, to the bottom-line benefit of her firm. She is known in the field as a competitive, persistent, highly creative contributor who teams and mentors with a generosity of spirit.